help me…nasty ex husband…?
Right…cutting a long story short my husband left our joint named property last june/july and has since not paid a single half of his mortgage and the council tax he had assured me he had paid.this week i recieved a letter saying i owe them 1500 and he has not paid a single installment…after phoning him he said he would sort it out now i have phoned him again to see what is happening and he has turned quite nasty i have already had bailliffs turn up this year over his debts and had to pay them off as he is refusing to give me his new address…now he is saying that he is going to force me to sell our joint house…can he do this?? also how can i get his mail redelivered to him so i am not having to sort his debt out whilst also trying to sort my own debts…we have seperated…also he owes my mum over 50000 how can i make sure he pays her back…he can get very nasty and is very difficult to talk to on the phone and i want to know how i can get this done easily as possible and as quickly….also we dont have any children
he has got the money to pay as he is moving from his rented flat into a 3 bed house…on his own for what i can gather…do i need his involvement for a legal separation?…i have asked for a divorce nd he is being difficult about it…also havnt got a solicitor atm…i dont reali no wot my rights r on house as my main residence as whether he can force a sale on not…
i have 2 b careful with the situation as he can b very nasty nd he will make my life hell as he will want me 2 suffer…i can afford just 2 pay 4 the house on my own but i just want him out of it…i have offered him if he signs house 2 me in my name i will pay off all debt he mainly owes and that will b end then we can divorce…but he got nasty…i havnt bin rude at all in this nd believe i have been mature nd polite considering
my house will never get what i deserve nd i dnt want 2 do work on it that he will b able 2 claim bk…he left place a mess with all his ‘diy’ ideas…nd it is a state im not just saying it holes everywer nd falling part…also it used 2 b my grandads nd holds lot of sentimental value that i wish 2 keep…lastly i wnt b able 2 afford 2 get anywer…arghhh im sorry it just seems a mess atm
Right, lots of questions here so I’ll start at the beginning.
In regards to council tax, it has to be paid no matter who is living there. Ideally, both you and your husband should have stumped up for it between you, but he hasn’t so you have to grin and bare it unfortunately. You may, however, be able to get a single person rebate so you don’t have to pay as much. I’m not sure whether this works retrospectively, so you need to check it out. Contact your local council offices for advice on this.
Any debts accrued while you are together are effectively both your debts if they are in joint names. A bailiff however cannot pursue you if he has personal debts. If anyone contacts you regarding debts that are personal to him, then you need to explain to them that he no longer resides at your address and you do not know where he is. It will help a lot if you can get proof that he no longer resides at your address as they will know you’re not just trying to cover his back.
The house is a tricky one. I’m assuming it will be classed as a joint asset. You really need to get a divorce solicitor involved now. When you state that you don’t know his new address, the courts can force a disclosure notice to relevant authorities so that they track him down and can issue him with the papers. The relevant authorities will be either Inland Revenue, the benefits agencies and a whole host of other organisations and they WILL find him. Assuming he responds using a solicitor then his new address will more than likely be passed on to your solicitor, and then on to you. You can then use this address to redirect any mail to him. Going back to the house, as I said, it will most likely be classed as a joint asset and the court may order it to be sold. If it’s in your name only or you can prove that he never paid any contributions to the mortgage then it does alter things slightly, but your solicitor can advise here. It doesn’t have to be sold though and you can buy him out of his share, but the problem is you’ll need to remortgage for it’s current market value or get a loan. Now this is where it can be swung to your advantage.
You said he owes your mother £50,000. If the market value of the house is say £80,000, that makes 50% of the value £40,000. Your mother can agree to either pursue him for the money (although £50K is over the threshold for small claims courts) or to have him sign the house over to you with a view to writing the debt off or part of the debt. She can then arrange some sort of payback scheme with you which means you’re not having to deal with mortgage companies etc and she’s more likely to be understanding if you hit a rough patch. If he refuses to do this, then unfortunately only your mother can chase up money he owes her as it’s classed as a loan.
If he does manage to force a sale of the house then his victory may be short lived. If you can inform his creditors that the house will be being sold and he’ll have money on such and such a date then they can apply to have his share of the money frozen so that they are paid. This will effectively stop him from getting a windfall and blowing the money or managing to hide it. This is complex though and best left to them to sort out.
In regards to mail, while you don’t have his address, simply cross out his name and mark it all as return to sender and pop it in your nearest post box. If you’re having debt collection agencies ringing the house then simply contact BT and ask for your number to be changed and made ex-directory. Do not give him your new number, but tell him to call you on your mobile instead. The best thing to do with this is tell him your number has changed and get a Pay As You Go SIM and phone (preferably on a completely different network to him and one that will be the most expensive for him to call you from) and then you won’t be hassled when you don’t want to be. If he tries calling your original mobile number just don’t answer it or bounce the calls to voicemail. If he’s only going to get an answer on one number then he’ll start calling it sooner or later. Remember, when you call him, type 141 before the number so it doesn’t let him know which number is calling.
Finally, if he’s being abusive in any shape or form then ask your solicitor about getting an injunction against him. This makes it illegal for him to contact you or for him to get anyone to contact you on his behalf.
All in all I’d say get a solicitor just to check that my advice is correct and, more importantly, to get divorce proceedings going. If he doesn’t co-operate it doesn’t matter. It may take around two years if he doesn’t but the sooner you get working on it, the sooner the pathetic excuse will be out of your life.
Good luck.